The Life Without Marriage

 

Xuefeng

 

Once one gets married and forms a family, he or she will be plunged in a life of misery. He or she will lose the fundamental freedom of being a man, not to mention the chance of attaining immortality or Buddhahood. 

 

Anyone with a family is selfish. They cannot help being selfish, because they are controlled, encumbered, and dominated by the programme of family. 

 

How much pressure a person must bear if he or she does not get married and form a family? The pressure of parents, the persuasion of relatives and friends, the care of neighbors and colleagues, the criticism from the society all bear down on our spirit and soul like huge mountains. The physiological demand, the desire for a home, the worry for illness and death, and the difficulty to relieve loneliness all make us desire instinctively to get married and form a family. 

 

If the above problems are not resolved, we will feel pain and suffering all the same, and we may even have greater pain and suffering if we do not get married and form a family, because getting married and forming a family is a matter of course and as easy as sailing downstream, while not getting married and forming a family is as difficult as sailing upstream. The problem is that sailing downstream leads to no other than pain and suffering, which history of mankind has proved to be unavoidable. Then we have no choice but to sail upstream. 

 

Let's discuss and resolve these problems one by one. 

 

First, the pressure of parents. We should be filial to our parents, but we cannot give in to our parents in the matter of life and LIFE. We know about the road taken by our ancestors all too clearly, it is a road of misery, which we should not repeat. If our parents force us to get married and form family, we must raise some conditions to them: 1. Ask our parents to tell us the significance and value of life, 2.ask our parents to tell us the nature and meaning of LIFE, 3, ask our parents to provide good housing conditions, 4. ask our parents to guarantee our happiness all our life. If our parents cannot meet these conditions, then we can tell them in definite terms that we can not get married and form a family. 

 

As for the persuasion of relatives, friends, neighbors and colleagues, we can also respond with the above four conditions. Or we can simply respond with one question: can you help me through if I encounter plight and pain after getting married and forming a family? Please give me a written pledge. As for the criticism from the society, we can just ignore it. If pigs say something is wrong with man's life, then just let them squabble. 

 

How can we solve the problem of physiological need? "The need for food and beauty is our inherent character. The need for sexual life is but a matter of course, otherwise the Greatest Creator would not have designed those organs and senses for us. A life without sex would be one with abnormal spirit and psychology. We will not only have sex, but also have sex of high quality and happiness. Why don't we? Only a fool would not have sex. 

 

Without marriage, with whom do we have sex? It is impossible to do this with chicken and ducks. Contracting disease is only a small matter when compared with the loneliness and solitude of spirit and soul that can't be relieved even after the acts. One can not afford it economically, and no one would care for your living, old age, illness and death. 

 

Can we find someone randomly to live with us? This may temporarily meet our urgent need, but does not provide long-term solution. What is worse is that we have to bear a lot of liabilities. We may commit irremediable mistakes and cause a series of chain reactions, and suffering and mystery may be endless. 

 

My advice is to become Chanyuan celestials and have the sex life with Chanyuan celestials. On the condition that you don't go against the ethics, you can make love with whichever Chanyuan celestial you want to be with, as long as the two of you are willing to do so. You can choose the way that you like. Because we have the same belief, we share the same frequency and resonance, we are a whole, we have the same life values, we are not bound together, we don't hurt each other, we are willing to pay everything for each other, including life. 

 

Here is the trouble! 

 

Once people, especially our relatives, friend, neighbors, and colleagues, know that we are Chanyuan celestials and are so casual and free, we will be drowned by condemnation, insult, revile, and grief, and we will be the helpless lambs surrounded by packs of wolves, torn, bitten, trampled, and swallowed. And this will be the price we have to pay for the pursuit of freedom. 

 

However, “one would rather die than lose the freedom". Without freedom, what do we live for? You live a life, but for whom do you live? 

 

Therefore, to get freedom, one must be prepared to remold himself thoroughly, and to be reviled by the so-called gentlemen, “kind-hearted people", moralists, and defenders of traditional moral principles. One must be prepared to completely break with the secular world. In one word, one be prepared to die. When I am writing these heretical remarks, when I say that the god preached by the Bible is not the real god, when I reprimand family, religion, political party, and state, I have been prepared to die anytime. I have said that every day might be my last day. However, I can speak the truth for myself, I am satisfied with my magnanimity and openness. Even if I am dead now, I have no regret, because I have lived a real life.